How To Photograph A Puppy :)
1.
Remove film from box and load camera
2.
Remove film box from puppy's mouth and throw in
trash
3.
Remove puppy from trash and brush coffee grounds
from muzzle
4.
Choose a suitable background for photo
5.
Mount camera on tripod and focus
6.
Find puppy and take dirty sock from mouth
7.
Place puppy in pre-focused spot and return to camera
8.
Forget about spot and crawl after puppy on knees
9.
Focus with one hand and fend off puppy with other
hand
10.
Get tissue and clean nose print from lens
11.
Take flash cube from puppy's mouth and throw in
trash
12.
Put cat outside and put peroxide on the scratch on
puppy's nose
13.
Put magazines back on coffee table
14.
Try to get puppy's attention by squeaking toy over
your head
15.
Replace your glasses and check camera for damage
16.
Jump up in time to grab puppy by scruff of neck and
say, "No, outside! No, outside!"
17.
Call spouse to clean up mess
18.
Fix a drink
19.
Sit back in Lazy Boy with drink and resolve to
teach puppy "sit" and "stay" the first thing in the
morning.
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